A: You’re looking curiously.

B: I’ve seen you got us something interesting and I would like to know what it is.

A: I brought something. Do we have children here? Children, you better go back to youtube now. We will unpack something that is nothing for you. This thing here is a ping-pong paddle …

B: … Third World ping-pong paddle.

A: Not it isn’t a Third World ping-pong paddle. This is – Third World wasn’t that bad a guess – a spanking paddle, made by an Indian fair trade project out of sustainable grown wood.

B: What is a spanking paddle?

A: I waited for that question … would you … no … a spanking paddle … a botty tenderizer … With this spanking paddle you can slightly – backhand, forehand everything is possible – softly but sensually spank your partners botty, while helping an Indian family that polished this thing. Great product, you can buy it at coco de mer which is an American adult shop. It’s somewhat like “Beate Uhse”(*) for intellectuals. 30 or 35 dollars I guess. It’s affordable and you do good while spanking. There isn’t anything better.

B: I’ve got one other question. Did anyone of the editorial team actually tried it?

A: It’s a good idea to talk about that … No, nobody tried it.

B: I figured, because you kissed it when you came.
I think thats enough.

(*) Beate Uhse is the name of a well known German mail order adult shop.